From time to time when my clients describe themselves to me, they say things like, “I'm very opinionated", “I have a hard time concentrating,” using very clear-cut terms. Interestingly, the ones that say they are opinionated nod their heads with confirmation when they are introduced new perspectives. And the ones that say they have a hard time concentrating, don’t miss a single word of our sessions, which are over an hour...
So at least, there are times that they are different than they think of themselves – and they're surprised when I point this out to them.
When I was a child, we would sometimes find a smelly green insect in our house, called a stinkbug. It would come to the light, the warmth of which would cause it to smell even worse. When my sister and I saw the insect, we would run away screaming. This wasn't the case just with this bug, it was the case with every bug...
Years passed by. I decided to make a number of changes in my life, taking steps towards the Hakan in my imagination... One day, I saw a spider in the bathroom. I took it into my hand and put it aside so that it wouldn't get wet and die. After putting it down, I screamed; I was amazed at what I had just done. I hadn't even considered about being afraid as I had picked it up. I also hadn't told myself anything like, “Come on Hakan, you can do it!” Before I knew it, I had simply taken up the spider and put him aside... I have no idea when I became that person who can pick up a spider with his bare hands.
That week, I saw a stinkbug in İstanbul for the first time. As if to test me, it landed on my car's gearshift. As my sister was going between jumping and screaming, I picked up the insect and threw it out the window.
So how did I achieve this? Here's what I think: I let new Hakans into my life every day. I don't label myself with unnecessary labels like “I'm afraid of insects" or "I'm like this" and "I'm like that”. As a result, new Hakans come along and I grow richer day by day... I call this living by multiplying...
My teacher, Bilge Şeker, told this one day: “Let's say I don't know how to bake a cake but I need to. In that case, I call for the Bilge who can bake a cake best and I unite her with myself.”
When you call upon your other selves and unite with them instead of saying things like, “I can’t” or “It’s too difficult”, you discover other sides of you whom you have not met before. Just like the Hakan who picked up the spider with his bare hands... Thus, life becomes easier as you multiply...
